Posted by: granny1947 | August 3, 2010

Granny’s Tuesday Tips

Good Morning All.

This morning I thought I would share some advice to anyone, over sixty, who is contemplating a walk on the beach in the middle of winter.
After five years of doing this I think I qualify as an advisor.
However, even I forget and hence this post.

Always check the wind.
Don’t just stick your finger up.
Wind is sneaky.
Look at the mountains.
If there are clouds at the top of the peaks there IS wind.
Yesterday there was a mild south easter.
This south easter,however, had made a detour over some snow laden mountains.
It froze my marrow.
To have a comfortable walk marrow should be warm.
Or in a soup bone.

The next is a very important tip.
Always remember to go to the loo before walking.
I was halfway along the beach when the urge hit.
By the time I reached the rocks at the end I was in pain.
On the way back I was looking at the dunes longingly.
Fingering the minute piece of tissue in my pocket.
I decided against it.

Tip number three.
If you have a camera slung around your neck…make sure the strap is not so long that the camera hits your tummy at every step.
This does NOT help when the urge to widdle is overwhelming.

Have a well behaved dog.
One that listens to instructions.
NOT one that sniffs every stone and flower while you stand at the car, yelling, get in!
With your legs crossed.

Try not to kill said dog on the way home.
While she grins at you.
Knowingly.

Now I need my coffee.

Have a super day.

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Responses

  1. An adult diaper is a diaper made to be worn by an adult. Diapers become necessary for adults who suffer from various conditions, such as incontinence, mobility impairment, or dementia. Adult diapers are made in various forms, including those resembling traditional child diapers, underpants, and pads resembling sanitary napkins (known as incontinence pads).

    In the medical community, professionals are trained to use alternative terms such as “briefs” rather than “diapers” for the sake of dignity, as the term “diapers” is associated with children and therefore may have a negative connotation. In practice, though, most health care workers are accustomed to calling them diapers, especially those that resemble children’s diapers.

    • Well now…very informative Cindy….are you ok???????

  2. Eeeeeu … while Googling for that I found several links to ‘adult diaper erotica’ … the mind boggles!

  3. Run Cindy Run! 🙂

    • I know where she lives Supa!

  4. Best I don’t move down to the beach then. 🙂

    Have a super day, Granny.

    • Morning Madmom…you are too young to have these problems…but just wait!

  5. Bwahaha! I think everyone over the age of 45 should remember to go to the loo before walking, especially if you’ve given birth naturally.

    @Cindy ‘adult diaper erotica’ – lots of weirdos out there!

    • Morning Adee…diaper and erotica in the same sentence…I don’t want to know!

  6. Bhwahaha! Granny erotica takes to the beach!

    • Never underestimate the elderly Douglas!

  7. Jeez Granny – how old exactly does Cindy think you are – her turn will come.
    *snigger*

    • Hehehe Misschris….revenge will be so sweet.

  8. Great tips granny. I don’t go for loooong walks on the beach, just manageable ones. That pic looks very wintry. Have a great day. Hugs xx

    • It WAS wintery AD….I got home with frozen extremities!

  9. umm Granny, me thinks Cindy needs a good talking to 😉 ha ha ha
    Off to in three days time, getting excited now, but still so much to do.

    • Hello Napier…I am getting excited for you too…have the mates got used to the idea yet?

      • yes granny, reluctantly I might add, but all getting together tomorrow night for drinks before I leave

      • Morning Napier…hope you had fun.

  10. Oh Granny, I had a good chuckle at this – thank you for making me smile. xxx

    • Good Morning Mid Thirty….glad I made you smile,love.
      What line of work are you in?

  11. *deeply contrite* Sorry, but I just HAD to laugh!

    • Well, being a man you would wouldn’t you…you can just stand at the side of the dune and look up at the sky whistling.

  12. You’re so funny, Granny 🙂 Loved this. And oh, that ocean…

    • I know my friend…can’t wait to be at that beach again in two weeks…counting the sleeps!


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