Posted by: granny1947 | June 30, 2010

Stronger Granny

Good Morning All.

The above picture was taken from my DIL’s verandah on Sunday.
I would be out there every morning with my coffee.

First….thank you so much for all the comments of support yesterday.
They are really appreciated.

I collapsed into bed just after eight last night.
Stress always exhausts me.
I was asleep by 8:30.
Woke later and thought…gosh I feel better.
Looked at the clock.
Eleven thirty!!!

So…I lay awake and mused.
When my younger daughter returned from rehab we went to a parent support meeting.
She turned around and told me I had enabled her to do drugs because I took over the kids.
I was dumbstruck.
So…last night I decided I will not enable any of my kids ever again.

Having said all of the above my younger daughter has just phoned.
Says she will have to drop off my daughter and the baby in Cape Town.
I said …where?
She said…with you!
She also said the 17 year old grandson,who is here on holiday, will have to stay here and go to school here.
Uhm….school uniforms etc?

My life is about to fall apart.

Maybe I should change the subject line?



  1. Oh dear, it doesn’t get any better does it. Hope you can sort this mess out and still be strong. I can’t begin to imagine what you’re mind is doing today granny. Tight hugs to you.

    • Hi AD…had a wobbly and bawled my eyes out…too much work to wallow now…will be working until seven!

  2. Oh no no no no no!!!
    Where is the family of her partner and why can’t they help?

    • Hi Cin…younger son was going to talk to him…haven’t heard yet.

  3. It would have been nice if someone had asked you – not just assumed. That to me is the worst.

    • Oh Rose…the whole attitude is YOU deal with it!

  4. Just say no! You have to for your own good.

    • I am trying Rob…I am trying.

  5. I would love to tell you to just say ‘No’ but I know it is difficult as a parent to do so.
    I hope you can. You need to have your own life now. I think you have already done so much for everyone.
    Good luck, Granny. Thinking of you.

    • Thanks Madmom…the support is helping a lot.

  6. I second what Madmom said, I feel for you, I really do.

    • I know Supa…you have been down a similar road…thank you.

  7. I don’t know how you feel about religion, but I’m going to say a prayer for you anyhow. You need some strength to deal with all of this. Take care.

    • Thank you Amy…prayers are good.

  8. Ag no Granny, I’m so sorry to hear of this latest development 😦
    Hugs and strength to you.

    • Thanks HP…I haven’t visited anyone today…I am sorry!

  9. This is so upsetting, however, at the end of the day she is your child and your heart will lead you to do the right thing – be it tough love or not. Thinking of you.

    • Thanks Wolf…much appreciated.

  10. You know I’m pulling for you from this corner of our planet.

    No strength is put to the test more then when it carries the truth.

    Mothers are not being ‘bad’ when they remain true to themselves. It may feel selfish at first, bit it is not selfishness. If we women do not look after ourselves, we become sick; then we cannot be there for anyone.

    The lie we tell ourselves is, “Oh well, it doesn’t matter.”

    Yes it does. It always has and it does now.

    • Thank you so much Amy…that means a lot to me right now!

  11. Oh no Granny…. That’s not even asking or discussing… that is “ordering”… 😦
    I’m sorry but this shows a marked lack of respect for a woman that have already done so much… big hugs and strength to you while you deal with this….

    • thanks Lynda…I agree…they have overstepped the mark…hence the present anger.

  12. Hi Granny — been awhile — am still having computer problems. Accessing a laptop at the moment. I’m so sorry to hear of your problems — kids can be such thoughtless little critters, can’t they? I don’t know you at all, only the bit I glean from your posts and these comments, but you strike me as a very capable, no-nonsense type of woman, and I don’t think loving your kids and wanting to help them is enabling them at all. It might sound kind of hokey, but if you believe strongly enough that everything will work out just fine — then it most likely will. Have faith in yourself and in what you’ve taught your kids, and don’t stop blogging or posting your lovely pictures! Sending wishes from Alberta your way.

    • thank you so much Klrs…don’t worry…am addicted to posting!

  13. Ai granny, sorry. One day you will be blessed BIG TIME for all the things you have to endure in your life right now. Wish I had a granny like you. Your grandchildren are blessed.

    • And then again Natasha…maybe you are lucky you DON’T have a granny like me..hehehe

  14. You okay Granny? I’m worried about you.

    • Thank you Rose…that is very sweet…I am doing ok.

  15. I second that Rose – guess she’s got a lot on her plate at the moment.

    • Hi Wolf…the plate is spilling over…next week will be better!

  16. Just a thought … do you have access to a support group or a 12-step group … where you’d have other people who’ve been through similar situations to talk to? In my case, I’ve been an Al-Anon member for years and it’s helped me find that fine line between helping and enabling (most of the time). Hang in there …


    • thank you Bud…it would probably help but right now I just want to step away from the whole damn mess.

  17. One has the inclination to put family before all else, but a line has to be drawn somewhere. From where I see it, somewhere has been reached. It is NOT really your problem, nor is it fair for them to make it so.

    • YesCol…the line has been reached!!!

  18. I don’t know what to say other than give you a BIG cyber hugxxx

    • Thanks BB…all hugs are very welcome.

  19. Hi Granny, am playing a bit of catch-up…
    Sounds like things are just a tad hectic ‘n mad your side. Thinking of you *hug*

    • thanks Mid-thirty…much appreciated.

  20. *hugs*

  21. Where are you?

    • Hi supa…busy,busy,busy!!!

  22. Oh Gran, what a mess! However they are adults and should learn to stand on their own two feet (17-yr old excepted). Help the teen by all means, but wash your hands of the rest – it’s for their own good! Perhaps a heart to heart with the youngster would help if, as you said, he used to be a nice boy. I feel for you!

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